My first dance

I guess that you could say that I had one thing on my bucket list that has now been crossed off.  Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to dance with a girl.  But, growing up in an anti-dancing home and marrying a wife who did not want to dance put that dream on hold.  So, I found myself a 54 year old man that had never danced.

When the subject of the Sock Hop came up, I was for it because I figured that I could blend in with the crowd and visit while those that wanted to dance did dance.  Then the Sock Hop was canceled due to a lack of people sending in their money and the gathering at The River was substituted for that.  I then became unsure of whether or not I really wanted to go.  I do not drink and I can't dance, so I really did not know what I would be doing there.

Then at the dinner at BJ's after the Homecoming game on Friday, Cindy Herring Bates came up to me and told me that if I wanted to, that she would teach me a few steps and have a dance with me.

Now Cindy is an excellent dancer as she dances all the time.  I remember after we graduated high school, she performed at the Southern Palace at Six Flags.  I remember going there several times and standing in line for hours with Joe Ben, David, and Paul Williams just to be told that there were no seats left.  I had no doubt that Cindy would go on to bigger things.  She has done just that while remaining that same person that we knew in high school.

So after my wife encouraged me to get out of the house and go to the event, I went.  The group of us were sitting there all together and listening to this band called MOJO Filter that I had never heard of before but really liked. After they got through with the first set, the juke box was turned on and Cindy leaned over to me and told me that if I was interested, we could either go to a back corner and practice a few steps or we could go straight out to the dance floor.  I chose to go straight out to the dance floor.  Cindy told me a couple of things (she kept it simple for me) and we got started.

She let me lead and matched her steps with mine as we went across the floor.  I would guide us and when I got off beat, she would nudge me back into beat.  There were times when she wanted us to try a couple things so I would move the upper part of my body as well as my feet.  She could read what I wanted to do and she also could communicate without speaking what she wanted and I had a great time.

Today as I reflected on my first dance, I realized a couple of things.  The first thing is what a great lesson this was for how a marriage should be.  A couple that is in tune with one another going through life together.  One would lead the direction but not be "the boss".  The other would have input into what they were doing and together they would go through life committed to each other.

The other thing that I reflected on was something that I had always been taught.  I was always told that dancing was wrong and that it would tear a marriage apart.  I found that the dance not only did not do that, it even helped me today with the relationship with my wife.  I did not feel imprisoned today.  I found myself more happy with my marriage than I had been in a long time.  Now nothing had changed with my wife or kids, but it had with me.  I found myself more committed to my wife.

Now I really value Cindy's friendship (as I do others) but, I am still in love with my wife.