The way that the definition of pastor has changed in my life.

Have you ever saw someone who held the office of Pastor and commented on how they were different because they were a real pastor, or have you ever thought that someone was a good preacher and or teacher and not a pastor?  Those types of thoughts show that there is a difference between someone holding the office of Pastor and being a pastor.  In other words these are 2 separate things.  Growing up I use to hear a cliche' that went;  "Preachers come a dime a dozen, but a pastor is hard to come by".  This too shows that the office of Pastor and the gifting to be a pastor is two different things.

So, what is the difference?  Can a person be both:  gifted as a pastor and hold the office of Pastor?  I believe that someone can be both, but the office can get in the way of using the gift of pastor.  I see the differences this way.  To hold the office of Pastor is to be the CEO of a corporation.  A Pastor overs sees the business of church.  He must be involved in the financial bottom line of the corporation (even with a finesse committee).  He oversees the programs of the corporation.  He is also the salesman of the corporation.

I believe that a person who has been gifted to be a pastor is really just a bell cow or in this case a bell sheep.  A bell sheep would be a sheep that knows the Shepherd and is experienced at following Him.  The Shepherd buts the bell on that sheep, so that as that sheep is moving as the Shepherd wants, the newer sheep will hear the bell and move with him.  In this way, they too will learn the ways of the Shepherd and someday will be bell sheep themselves.  To put this in human terms, a true pastor is someone who walks and loves like God.  Someone that you can go to for advice.  Someone you can go to in times of trouble.  Someone who you know will love you even when they do not agree with you.  They will be honest with you while loving you.  Someone who really does not need to tell you about God, because to be with that person is to be with and see God and to know the love of God.  A true pastor is intimately involved in other peoples lives and not hiding behind Secretaries in an office down the hall.

 Jesus once said to not call people Father, Teacher, or Rabbi because they were not God,  I believe that Jesus was telling us to not put people between us and God.  To elevate someone in this matter can really usurp the role of The Holy Spirit.  The Holy Spirit is to be our guide, teacher, the one who convicts us, our comforter.  In short He is God in us.  

I have come to a funny point in my life.  I still enjoy listening to good expository preaching, but I no longer acknowledge the office of Pastor in regards to my life.  I have many friends and family to do see the need for a Pastor and I have friends to hold the office of pastor and I do not mean to condemn any of them or anyone else with my beliefs.  Even though our beliefs may be different on this I respect and honor you for your beliefs.  These are just that, my beliefs.  They are between me and God and  everyone else needs to approach God the Father about this for themselves.

It is my wish that everyone will know the Love of God for themselves and dwell in that Love to the point that when others see you, they are really seeing God's love through you.

Dennis

change in definitions in church.

Have you ever thought of the different meanings that we give to the word church?  When we ask someone where they go to church, what do we mean?  We use church to refer to buildings and property or to refer to an incorporation, or a set of services, or even church staff.  I am not trying to criticize anyone for their beliefs.  I am only trying to explain mine.

I see the word church to really be just the plural of the word believer.  I mean anytime believers are together they are called church.  These get togethers can be planned or just meetings of "chance".  When I read the New Testament, I see examples of these get togethers but no command saying this is the way that it must be done.

As someone who not only had grown up attending traditional church meetings, but was a leader with in them, I began to realize that something was missing in these meetings.  I believe that even though we talked about God being there, we really did not experience Him as Friend or a close loved one.  I have been drawn by the Spirit to look at christianity 101 and to see people as the early christians did.

I think that as we get together with our friends, we are to" spur one another on to love and good works",  ^{& to "}encourage each other"  For me this is better done in intimate settings, instead of corporate meetings where everyone who gathers is told what to do, what to sing, what to give, and what to think.  For me this best done by sharing with each other from the heart, friend to friend.  to be there for each other, to bear with each other.  We realize that any changes in us can only be made by God through us.  That is grace.  That is living inside out.  God cleans the inside of our hearts and so our attitudes and actions change.  Any changes that we attempt to make by coercion, will only change the actions.  An alcoholic can stop drinking but in their soul they are still an alcoholic unless they are changed on the inside.  The same is true with each of us and all of our short comings.  It is only when God changes our insides that true changes occur. 

The Dance

Some of the Alumni are planning a dance in Sept. a week after the Alumni Lunch.  I am always glad to get together with my friends and I am supporting both events.  I am also hoping that a bunch of people show up at each one.

However, dancing does have concerns for me.  First there is the fact that I do not know how to dance.  I have never got up on a dance floor and danced.  I have never done so publicly.  Never do so with a partner.

The second thing is how will that affect my marriage.  I am not talking about affecting my wife because I am not having secret rendezvous with anyone or going out of town to spend time in a motel with anyone.  I am talking about how will dancing affect my attitude towards my marriage.  Is stepping out on a dance floor with someone no different from twirling around the living room with my granddaughter or something more?

I don't have the answers to this one and since I have not experienced this, then I cannot draw upon my past either.  As far as getting the answer from the Bible, that can go either way.   I believe David either danced with other women or danced in a matter that exposed himself to other women while The Ark Of The Covenant was returning to Jerusalem and God was pleased even if Michal wasn't.

Dennis

Scattershooting.

Back in 1979, my wife and I went to Missouri with some close friends (Mike and Sharon Paris) who were from there.  We spent a couple of days in Fredricktown with Sharon's family and while we were there, her Dad was talking about our Summers here in Texas and said that we were "next door to Hell" with all the heat that we have.  This past week reminded me of him telling me that.

Lometa's husband, Bobby Rorie had an Aunt Rosie who past away this past week and my heart goes out to them.  I knew his Aunt Rosie and her family when I was a kid and told my Mom about her passing away.  My Mom told me that she had known her since the 1st grade ( at Tripp which is now known as Sunnyvale) and had gone to school with her though High School (Mesquite High School) as well as church.  I knew that my Mom's mom ( whom I called Dodo) grew up on land that is now covered by Lake Ray Hubbard, but my Mom also told me that Dodo's mother's family had lived there for a while and that our relationships with the Duckworths go back several generations.  I had always thought that I was the first one in my family to be friends and to grow up with the Duckworths ( however I did know that Mom grew up with Bubba's mom), so I guess that tells you how much I know.


I went to the circus today, and I liked it.  While watching the performances, I noticed a couple of mistakes by the performers.  One of the acrobats missed her jump and the rope that she was wearing caught her and kept her from falling.  There were men holding the other end of ropes that they were wearing and these people not only made sure that the ropes kept the performers safe but also that the ropes did not prohibit them from performing.  I really thought that was a nice picture of what love is like, whether it is God's love for us or our love for each other.


Dennis

If someone wrongs you within the NMHS Alumni of the Seventies.

I really love this high school alumni group that I am in.  It is growing and I believe that many of us are actually closer now than when we were in high school.  As the group goes forward, there will be times when one of us will do things that will hurt someone else in the group.  The question then becomes; how do we handle those times.  

I have no authority and this is strictly my opinion.  I think that the best course of action is the one of love.  So, how does love handle such things.  The first thing is to contact that person on a one to one basis.  It could be that what is going on is a simple misunderstanding or something that is unintentional.  If we go to that person first instead of running to someone else or blasting them on Facebook or some other service, then we can restore the friendship instead of making things worse.

If  things cannot be worked out on a one to one basis then get one or two others to join in the process.  A true friend who loves both people can be a big help in working things out.  

If the situation still not worked out, then this would be the spot to let the whole group know.  About 100 - 1000 posts on a wall can be an eye opener, especially if that person is told that until this is resolved then as far as we are concerned, they graduated from that other high school.  ;-)

I feel like we have a great group and I do not want to lose any friends.  I think that as long as we lived loved and love each other, then things will be good.

A different picture of love

All of us have heard something about what love is.  Those of us who attend some meeting of the church or gone to a wedding has probably heard something from 1 Corinthians 13 (called the love chapter).  How ever also in the Bible are these verses:

 Rom 13:10 Love does no wrong to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

Rom 13:8 Owe no one anything, except to love one another, for the one who loves his neighbor hasfulfilled the law.

Gal 5:14 For the whole law can be summed up in a single commandment, namely, “You must love your neighbor as yourself.”

Jam 2:8 But if you fulfill the royal law as expressed in this scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing well.

If these verses are true and I believe that they are, then love will act like this:


If a person loves their family then if possible, they will take one day of the week and use it for rest and family time.

A person will appreciate their parents for what they have gone through and not go around blaming them for  the misfortunes that have been inherited.

If one loves the people around them they will not murder them by thought, word, or action.  They will also not have an affair (by thought, word or action) with a person's spouse if you love both of them.
One will not spread lies about someone they love.One will not even want the possessions of people that they love.

Just a thought.

"When you are affected by what others think and say about you then they own you"

I am 54 years old and most of my life I have lived by the statement that your reputation is the most important thing about you.  So everything I did was done to impress people and look perfect.  ( There was also another thing going on in my life in that I felt that the only way I could be loved is if I was number 1 in everything that I did, but that is another issue that although happened at the same time was also different and is separate issue that I can talk about at another time.)  

When reputation was king, I was very aware about the ways others would view my actions.  This caused me to not to reach out and be the friend that I needed to be to some because of how that would have been viewed.  I was a lot more concerned with my self righteousness than love for others.  As I have shared about my hurts growing up, several people have told me that they felt the same way also.  I cannot help but think that maybe if I was not so consumed with myself, then I could have reached out and others would not have gotten hurt.  

Another characteristic was the way I reacted to false comments that were made about me.  I learned early in life that fighting would not change anything, but I would still  cut myself off from anyone that I felt that did me wrong.  As I look back, I realize that this was the main reason that I never came to any of the reunions until the 30th.  The main reason that I came then was a promise that I had made to Carol Pace Robertson after the 20th reunion.  (She was working in a school with my wife and had called the house to talk to her about school, but I answered the phone.  She laid into me for over an hour about not coming to the 20th.  Actually that was probably the longest that she had talked to me our whole lives.  The conversation ended with a promise from me that if possible, I would attend the 30th.)  I came fulfilling that promise. 

Also some others things happened to me between the 20th and 30th reunions, as people within churches began to try to orally assassinate me.  I was forced to leave a couple of churches and bounced around until I became involved within relationships and what some call Christianity 101.  

It was about that time that I came across a quote that went something like this, "When you are affected by what others think and say about you then they own you". There is another cliché that I have quoted often that says that we need to lived loved and that will allow us to love others.

For me, I knew that I needed to let Jesus love me and to realize that there was nothing that I could do to make Him love me more and there was nothing that I could do that would make Him love me less.  As I have accepted this teaching, I have naturally started loving others more.  

You can see this in the pictures that Dean has taken of me at the reunions.  There was a time when I would not have allowed a picture to be taken of me and another woman because that would lead to people saying that we must be having an affair (I know this because that was the culture that I grew up in).  Now that doesn't bother me like it use to because we are just friends and I and everyone else there knows that nothing could be further from the truth.  (Now I will say something if I feel something is going too far, but still I am not bothered like I used to be.)

It is when I am not affected by what someone else thinks or says that enables me to see their hurts and to reach out and to help them heal their hurts.  I am not there yet, but I am still on this journey.